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Why do we start a new year, with promises to improve?
Who began this tradition of never-ending pressure?
I say, the end of a year, should be filled with congratulation, for all we survived.
And I say a new year should start with promises to be kinder to ourselves, to understand better just how much we bear, as humans on this exhausting treadmill of life.
my brain and
heart divorced
a decade ago
over who was
to blame about
how big of a mess
I have become
eventually,
they couldn’t be
in the same room
with each other
now my head and heart
share custody of me
Blessed be the longing that brought you here
And quickens your soul with wonder.
May you have the courage to listen to the voice of desire
That disturbs you when you have settled for something safe.
What if you were sent here for something larger
Not against your will or wishes
But in alignment with your deepest longing
What if it was as simple as finding what you love
And letting it teach you how to live.
Oriah House, author of THE INVITATION
Here’s the bad news:
You can’t get ‘over’ a feeling.
You can’t get ‘past’ it.
You can’t release it.
You can’t let it go.
You can’t transform it or transmute it.
You can’t even heal it.
i felt beautiful until the age of twelve
when my body began to ripen like new fruit
and suddenly
the men looked at my newborn hips with salivating lips
the boys didn’t want to play tag at recess
they wanted to touch all the new
and unfamiliar parts of me
the parts i didn’t know how to wear
didn’t know how to carry
and tried to bury in my rib cage.
They have come for us
We who are female
We who bleed
They are trying to pull us backwards
To a time when their hatred of us was open
Where they controlled all of what we said and did
Their patriarchy perpetuates itself through their churches
Those who will not slip beneath
the still surface on the well of grief,
turning down through its black water
to the place we cannot breathe,
will never know the source from which we drink,
the secret water, cold and clear,
nor find in the darkness glimmering,
the small round coins,
thrown by those who have wished for something else.
David Whyte
My very essence was not affirmed.
So I took it all and kept it inside.
Mom was emotionally unavailable
and perhaps she kept me small for different reasons.
I was not affirmed.
But then also,
maybe my essence was uncomfortable for her.
Maybe she didn’t want me to stray too far outside the boundaries/the lines.
Quiet friend who has come so far,
feel how your breathing makes more space around you.
Let this darkness be a bell tower
and you the bell. As you ring,